Defy her with love

The story of North & South, by Elizabeth Gaskell, has gotten some noted attention after the 2004 BBC mini-series with Richard Armitage. Admittedly, I had never heard of the story before the mini-series, which I only saw earlier this year (thanks to a friend who recommended it to me). Instantly, I fell in love.

A lot of people draw parallels between this story and that of Pride and Prejudice, mostly because of the disputes and hostility among the lovers (Mr. Thornton and Margaret Hale; Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet).

I read the book after watching the mini-series, and immediately it became my second-favorite novel. My favorite passage occurs right at the beginning of Volume II. Mr. Thornton is dealing with his feelings for Miss Hale and her refusal:

He had positive bodily pain,--a violent headache, and a throbbing intermittent pulse.... He said to himself, that he hated Margaret, but a wild, sharp sensation of love cleft his dull, thunderous feeling like lightning, even as he shaped the words expressive of hatred. His greatest comfort was in hugging his torment; and in feeling, as he had indeed said to her, that though she might despise him, contemn him, treat him with her proud sovereign indifference, he did not change one whit. She could not make him change. He loved her, and would love her; and defy her, and this miserable bodily pain.

This is what defines Mr. Thornton and Mr. Darcy as men. They love their women despite their refusals, despite what objections others (family/society/obligations) demand of them. And, even being scorned, they love the ladies still. What a torment it must have been, to love with that constancy, never knowing if their love would ever be returned. That is one of the greatest attractions I find in the novels Pride and Prejudice (1813) and North and South (1855).

Both novels are highly recommended!

Side note: I'm reminded of Great Expectations, by Charles Dickens... and Pip's poor admiration for Estella. In particular, I think of this quote:

Love her, love her, love her! If she favors you, love her. If she wounds you, love her. If she tears your heart to pieces--and as it gets older and stronger, it will tear deeper--love her, love her, love her!

And so he does... despite her mistreatment of him.

It gets me to thinking, do we love with the same feeling as those who loved back then? It sounds like the recovery for them is harder to come by. (Of course, all this information is obtained from fiction, but still....) In a society that focused mainly on the obtaining of marriages, imagine what unrequited love could do to one's disposition.